A lovely visit with Zack’s home nurse

I walked in the garage door this morning after dropping off the boys at school, and felt sad as I have been this past week. This was the time that Zack would come around the corner to meet me and we’d start our day (with Sue). This morning laying on the floor was his soft ball. The other boys don’t play with this ball…it was Zack’s. In fact, it was the ball that Zack and Sue played each day she was with him. I smiled knowing that Zack was letting both myself and Sue know, that he was still with us.

Today I had a great cry remembering my amazing Zack. As much as the boys are a wonderful distraction, I still need time to let my emotions be raw and not hide them from their eyes. Today, I sat on the couch with Zack’s home nurse, Sue and we told stories that made us laugh and cry about the ups and downs of the last year with our amazing Zackie.

As we packed up medical supplies to send to the kids in the African orphanage, Forever Angels, we reminisced about her time with Zack over the last year. Sue came to our house three days a week and cared for Zack as well as I did. She knew his moods, how to comfort him, his favourite foods, toys he loved and shirts that he hated to put over his head.

When we first met Sue, we knew she was an amazing nurse who would care for our precious and fragile son, but we thought she might be “serious” in her days with Zack. Boy, did our Zackie ever win her over! It didn’t take long for Sue to be running to see him each morning and stay to give him one last hug each night. Zack lit up when she walked in the room, and she adored and spoiled him.

I wanted to share what she wrote, the day Zackie died. I loved how her words captured a day with our determined and loving son.

Written by Sue Duff, R.N. and a very important woman in our family:
I cannot think of just one favourite moment that I spent with Zackie. They were all precious and incredible. Everyday he fought battles, won courageous moments and stole everyones heart with his infectious smile! I guess,if I had to choose, it would be how he communicated with me. He may not of said a lot of words but his actions were quite clear. Zackie would clap his hand on my leg when he wanted to be picked up. I loved to carry him…although Mom would say, “he is a big boy, he doesn’t need to be carried”. I couldn’t resist when he glanced up at me with that incredible walnut smile. Grab my hand, when he wanted to walk…I got a lot of exercise until he mastered the art on his own. When he was hungry he would sign and walk to the cupboard where his favourite pudding was. If you didn’t respond fast enough he would get his place mat out and bring it to the table. When he didn’t like your choice of food he knew how to let you know! Pointing to the cupboard until you got the right one out! Which was vanilla pudding….of course! When he was done eating he threw the dishes on the floor. Pretty explanatory if you ask me! Oh, I should mention…No BIBS! As fast as you put them on he took them off. After all…he was a big boy who could feed himself. Bath time was a favourite time for him. He loved the warm water and toys but when he was done…he pulled the plug! When he was tired he would hum the Elmo song…it was time to sit in his favourite chair and fall asleep watching Elmo. His Hero! I really can’t sing…most people would leave the room to hear my voice. BUT for Zackie I mastered, “Row Row Your Boat”. To sing this song was the only way he would accept the inhaler treatment(mask with aerochamber) for his asthma. Best of all was when he wanted a cuddle or a hug…he would put his loving arms around your neck and place his adoring cheek to the right and to the left…maybe there is Russian in his family history. Ba!…Ba! was his language. It meant he was having a good day!

I will miss you sooo…much! You will forever be in my thoughts and my heart! I am so blessed to have been able to share in your life.

March 10, 2011 8:56 AM