I’ve been around babies since Zack died. I’ve seen them, they’ve come to my house and I’ve even attended baby showers.All of those situations have been very hard for me.The truth is that I have had such a difficult time with anything baby since Zack’s been gone. Not only because I’ve lost a child, but […] Read more…
Zack’s room was the place where he and I would rock the night away. The place where I tried to get a few minutes of sleep between humming the Elmo song, during his 2am episodes.It’s the place where he would sit in his bouncing chair and get his meds and his gtube feed each night […] Read more…
Our Blurb photo book arrived!!!! This Christmas, I decided to make a special book about Zackie. All of our favourite family photos with him, some silly shots, photos from his therapy and with his loving brothers. I spent several nights uploading all of the photos and using the templates to create the perfect layouts, background […] Read more…
A week has passed since 20 moms lost their precious children in the most horrific end to their short lives. There was no peace for these children or their parents, no chance to hold them when they were scared or comfort them in their arms when they were taking their last breath. To add to […] Read more…
…is you! While I’m singing this song and thinking of the son I lost, so many other women are singing it about the baby they are aching to have. While one of us is a mother and one is a “mother” in her heart, the one thing that we have in common is the aching […] Read more…
It started way back in the office at the Footprints Therapy. Zackie was going to see his Osteopath for a practise that I still don’t fully understand, but totally and completely value. The therapist told me that I reminded her of another mom- Dana Florence…a mom who had triplets with cerebral palsy but that in the face […] Read more…
To my beautiful Zackie, Another year without you on your birthday. You would have been 5 today. The memories are just as heartbreaking, my Zackie, even though this is the second birthday without you. I feel the bittersweetness of planning a special party for your twin brother, while I still feel your absence today and always.I wrapped special toys and gifts for Jayden […] Read more…
(I haven’t been able to write the very last day in two years, but this year, I really wanted to preserve the memories. I want those horrible and painful hours to live here on the pages, and not in my head or on my shoulders. The truth is that those days seemed like weeks and they […] Read more…
Zack loved the boat! at Nana and Poppa’s My parents arrived just after midnight and were escorted in a golf cart through security and customs- thanks to my sister. They told me later, that when they saw the cart for them- they thought that they were too late, that Zack had died. They both […] Read more…
It was just after midnight, the doors opened and a Anesthesia doctor, Brian Kavanagh, appeared- a man I had never met before, but will never forget. He calmly walked over and asked us to sit down, while he sat on the table in front of us (the photo shows the table and blue bench where we sat- […] Read more…