Today is always a special day in my heart and in our family. While there won’t be cake or balloons or any presents, it’s a day that brought us two celebrations in our lives.
On March 27th, 2008, our little Zackie got his first hearing aids! I can’t find that amazing photo and I would have Instagrammed it, had we had it back then, but the look on his face was totally unforgettable. The world opened up to him that day and while I had had a very hard time accepting that Zack would have hearing loss as yet another obstacle in his development, I embraced it that day.
At Branson Hospital on Finch, our audiologist, Mary, put in his molds, attached the aids and finally turned them on. In my arms, my little son’s eyes lit up as if the world had been turned on. Tears poured down my face as he looked around while we spoke. We grabbed our goodie bag of hearing aid equipment and we were on our way. The adventures with those hearing aids were never ending. Zack liked to throw them around when I wasn’t looking. He was forever taking them out and as he got older, he gave both his nurse and I such attitude when we put them back in. It was a love/hate relationship for me with those aids, while I loved that they provided better hearing for Zack, it was a huge struggle just to keep them in. You can tell in the photo below and in other photos I’ve shared, that he was always so fascinated with ears…I wonder if he was looking for hearing aids on the other kids. One day he even put the mold in his mouth and refused to eat. I had no idea what was going on until I saw something in his mouth- he had it in there most of the day! Such a little stinker! But that beautiful day in March, when Zack was 6 months old and heard the world with his new “ears” will forever be a special day to me.
It was only a year later, on March 27th, 2009, when we finally had the day booked for Zack’s surgeries at SickKids! Back on his first birthday in September, he was only 17lbs and diagnosed with “failure to thrive”. He had been throwing up most thickened feeds and it was impossible to get him to gain and maintain weight when he was so sick often and just refused to eat. The doctors told us that they needed to put him on the list for a Gtube. The last thing that I wanted for him was a feeding tube. I was overwhelmed with all that I was going to have to learn and how our routine was going to change so drastically! As the fall progressed, Zack’s weight and health were declining and I quickly changed my mind and started begging SickKids to get us an emergency date so that we could get him stronger and healthier.
After one cancellation due to pneumonia and several calls to sweet talk the various clinics, I had finally convinced the hospital to put Zack under a general anesthetic only the one time and do a round up of other minor procedures as well. Zack was scheduled to have his skin tags removed by his ears, a circumcision and the Gtube. After the surgery, my amazing boy was so sick with a fever from the anesthetic. It was a struggle, but a week later we were both home learning what life would be like with this new tube. We went home with our feeding pump, various syringes, gauze, ointments for infection and tons of other gadgets that would fill my cupboard. We sure had some GTube fails, like when it came out in the middle of a night feed and thick formula was dripping down the crib and soaked the bed and the carpet. Or what about when I lifted Zack out of his carseat to find the GTube in his seat! I still have no idea how that thing came out- but I sure impressed myself (and Paul) by putting it back in! It took some getting used to for sure, but just like the hearing aids, the new Gtube gave Zack what he had been missing, a safe way to eat, a way to get his meds and get nutrition. With the help of incredible feeding specialists, nutritionists, nurses and pediatricians, not only did Zack make it onto the growth charts, he started to have strength, endurance, and energy like never before! His development sky rocketed and I know that the Gtube was instrumental in getting him to his ultimate goal of walking!
Today is a beautiful day to remember two momentous days in our family, days that changed Zack’s life and mine for good.
