Oh what a night…no, I’m not singing the score from Jersey Boys…instead I had another crazy long night with Zackie!
Zack has been up since 12:30am and it’s now 5:22am! In between replaying Elmo on the pvr, picking up his thrown soother, giving him a ventolin mask and pacing the floor with him…I have found about 25 minutes of sleep!I know that being a parent is not exactly great for sleeping and in fact, as a mommy, you never really sleep deeply again…but when you have a child like Zack, you literally take each night as a big surprise. Some nights he actually sleeps through, others…not so much.
In the beginning, when he was discharged from Sick Kids, we literally woke up to check that he was still breathing. Then as he has grew older, he has had nights when he wakes up crying in the middle of the night. With his risk of aspiration when he gets upset and two other brothers across the hall, we just can’t “ferberize” him and let him cry himself to sleep. Instead, I have learned to sleep on my back to jump out of bed faster so we can run to him when he cries, walk the floor with him (having to pat him very firmly) to get him to fall back asleep. In the last 12 months we have had nights where Zack wakes up and thinks its the daytime! For hours in the night, he will talk, bounce and want to play. There are no rules for when or why this happens, but we continue to fall asleep each night wondering how our sleep will be.
We have a few tricks that we have tried, but we really still have a crap shoot- I guess our bodies have just gotten used to a prolonged lack of sleep. However, I haven’t gotten used to the bags and dark circles under my eyes, and I do have an extensive collection of expensive eye creams!
My rant does have a happy ending…at 5:24am, Zack scootched over to me and said “mama” pulling himself up to standing at my bedside. While I have to admit I wasn’t totally “in love” with him from 1am until now….this moment between me and my Zackie is why I can cope on little sleep. The sparkle in that sweet boy’s face when he comes to find me and put his arms around my neck. I was “in love” once again and snuggled my little Zack until he fell back asleep 20 minutes later.How do you deal with sleepless nights?
Myrtle's Turtles
August 11, 2010 at 12:15 pm (14 years ago)Love the new look! You are doing a great job over at PTPA with so little sleep. We must be pacing the floors at the same time. With my newborn and my other baby (my new website) I have been having a lot less sleep lately! It will pay off in the end.
TJZMommy
August 11, 2010 at 1:37 pm (14 years ago)Yes! It is paying off! Funny how when I was awake at 5am I was inspired to blog….what all Supermommies do when they can’t sleep!
Zoe Tate Fielding
August 11, 2010 at 1:41 pm (14 years ago)Oh Heather, i’m sorry to hear about your and Zackie’s night, but touched and happy with the ending. When I have a sleepless nite (Kev sleeps, because one of us has to be awake) i usually sort of surrender and resign myself to being up. I had more sleepless nites than restful ones when Erin had cancer two years ago and she taught me about being in the moment, so i didn’t think about tomorrow, i just focussed on making her cumfy. This is probably much easier for me because the sleepless nites are far more infrequent than yours. I hope this helps my darling friend.
Kath
August 11, 2010 at 2:45 pm (14 years ago)Poor Zackie and poor Mama! not sure how you function on so little sleep and always with a smile on your face! You even respond to my 5 billion emails a day 🙂
Sneak in a quick nap todayxo
TJZMommy
August 11, 2010 at 2:48 pm (14 years ago)Yes…being in the moment works for half of the night, then I just want to lay down! All worth it for one of Zack’s smiles!
Supermommy is off to the zoo…who needs sleep??? Rather spend it with my kids who slept last night!!!
Angie
August 11, 2010 at 4:52 pm (14 years ago)Wow. You are inspiring.
After a brutal night, I plop my little guy down in front of the t.v. with a bowl of cereal.
I make a cup of very strong tea, sit down beside him and read the paper (I need to connect to the outside world to remind me of the bigger picture).
I take a cool shower and remind myself that bedtime WILL come!
(I feel less alone after reading your story – helps to know we’re not alone on this sleep-deprived road).
Jana
August 11, 2010 at 9:13 pm (14 years ago)I love the new colour! It’s so much brighter and I like it better… sleepness nights then continuing to the best mom = amazing. I hope I’ve half as good as you, when the time comes.
Give Z a kiss for me. 🙂
Sherry C
August 12, 2010 at 2:14 am (14 years ago)Heather your always amazing me I used to spend lots of nights up with Ashley especially when she was g-tube feed all night once we stopped that she’s been an amazing sleeper as long as she not ill. I’d recommend cutting out night feeds if at all possible. Great job with your new bloggie look.