The day Zack was born and we were aware of his urgent cardiac needs, we spent the night at our local hospital begging for a room in Toronto. The Cardiac NICU team told us that there were no rooms at SickKids and made us aware that our other options were London, Hamilton or Montreal!
We were overwhelmed to think that we may have to uproot our new family of 5. Ty was only 3 years old and had just learned that his little brother was not coming home for a while and we also had Zack’s newborn twin brother to care for too. To move to a city closer to our son who was fighting for his life would have added to the already emotionally draining situation we were in. It would have meant our family would be split up, that our friends and family couldn’t come to see us and offer their support and that Ty wouldn’t have some sense of normalcy in going to his daycare each day while we were at the hospital caring for Zack.
It was a long and horrible first night until we heard that Zack’s cardiac emergency was so grave that he did require the closest transport and they did find a room at SickKids downtown. We considered that the “best news” at that time and even today, we are so grateful that we never had to worry about moving our family to care for our sick little boy.
While I know what having a sick child feels like, we survived the first 5 weeks of Zack’s life making the commute downtown but spending our nights in our own home with our other two boys. I can imagine that leaving the comfort of home and taking siblings out of their usual routine must make an already horrible situation even more heartbreaking for the entire family. I know the impact on your marriage, finances, your other children and every aspect of your family life. I also know what it’s like to rise above those challenges and be inspired by the amazing miracles around you.
When Zack died, just over 5 years ago, we had another extended stay in SickKids and had the chance to find comfort and solace in the Family Room beside the ICU. While it hadn’t been renovated by Ronald McDonald Charities at that time, we were relieved to have the opportunity for an escape from the sadness of the ICU and privacy to be alone with our emotions, rest privately and take a shower to recharge for the emotional days ahead.
Spending the days within the four walls of any hospital room is a lonely and emotional experience but we have been blessed to have met some amazing families along our journey. Some of these families have had to travel from other cities to Toronto in search of the best care for their fragile child. I was fortunate to meet the amazing mommy of one of Zack’s first roommates, Ben. She was from Guelph and stayed at the Ronald McDonald House in Toronto while Ben received several operations for his heart defects. He was hospitalized for much of his first year and Michelle left her home and her husband to stay close to Ben in Toronto. She stayed by Ben’s side from morning to night and we would sit our rocking chairs together and talk while our boys slept. When she needed a little break, she’d walk back to her small but comfortable room at the House down the street to have a shower or rest. The nurses would then page her when Ben woke up, so that his Mommy was always there when he opened his eyes. I remember talking to her about the difficulties of leaving home, her job and family and how appreciative she was to have been accepted into the House. She also felt less isolated by being surrounded by other parents who were going through exactly the same thing.
In the years since Zack’s earliest hospital stay, I have met many other inspiring families like my friends Kayla and Sawyer who regularly stay at the new Ronald McDonald House in Toronto or Lisa and Wyatt who stayed during most of Wyatt’s short life. I’ve even had the opportunity to tour the new facilities and see that not only does this incredible place exude love and kindness, the new facility has evolved to a really beautiful building that offers respite and privacy during a crazy and scary time in a parent’s life. I was especially impressed with the school within the grounds, where siblings can carry on their studies when they are there supporting their sick brothers or sisters. Over the last several years, the new facility has evolved to a really beautiful building that offers respite and privacy during a crazy and scary time in a parent’s life, with schools for siblings, fully- equipped communal kitchen, library and bedrooms that are modern, comfortable and spacious. RMHC Canada is the national organization that supports Ronald McDonald Houses and Ronald McDonald Family Rooms across the country, which provides families of sick children a home-away-from-home or a place of peace and calm within a hospital. Last year, 748 families from across Canada stayed at the House and 2384 families were supported through the Ronald McDonald House Family Rooms.
I support the McHappy Day initiative to continue to provide for families like ours, during their darkest days caring for their sick child. On Wednesday May 4th, $1 dollar from every Big Mac, Happy Meal and hot McCafé beverage sold will go to local children’s charities, including Ronald McDonald House Charities Toronto. Last year, McHappy Day raised $595,624 for RMHC Toronto, making it their single biggest fundraising day of the year! This year, on Wednesday, May 4th, our family will be having dinner at McDonald’s and supporting brave fighters like Zack, Sawyer, Wyatt, Ben and so many other kids and their families who depend on Ronald McDonald House Charities to keep families together, help reduce stress and provide comfort.
Ronald McDonald Houses help give sick children what they need most – their families.
Receive updates on McHappy Day® by “Liking” McDonald’s Canada on Facebook and follow McDonald’s Canada on Twitter or follow the #McHappyDay hashtag.
Disclaimer: Each year I write about our support of this important initiative. This year, I’ve been compensated for sharing my story. I’m honoured to have been asked to help spread the word to support Ronald McDonald House.