Dear Puberty,
You and I need to talk. You see, since you’ve entered our home and invaded my teenage son’s body, he’s not the little boy I once knew. Don’t get me wrong, I knew this was bound to happen and I was even excited for him to reach this new stage, but did you have to do make him so different? So unlike the kids I knew for 12 years?
It can be rough being the only girl in an all male house…you know the bathroom humour, stupid boy jokes, trail of clothes to pick up around the house and unending hunger…but when he used to call me “his girl”, it would make all stinky work disappear. Sure, I can handle your new smells, extra hairy parts and growth spurts…no problem, but the changes to his mood and personality is really making me sad and missing my little boy. He was the one who wanted to marry me, hold my hand, spend time with me and defend me at all costs…and now I can be a total embarrassment. He comes for a drive and he looks so sad but when I ask, it’s nothing! He literally just always seems to look depressed for no reason! Puberty, you are very confusing!
There a glimpses of him now and then and thankfully, between his time behind the closed bedroom door and time on his phone, he cracks a smile (may even laugh) and still makes time to share what’s happening in his world…the ups and downs with his friends, school stress and even some girl stuff! He will wake me up with a kiss on the cheek and even spontaneously hug me and then hold on tight just to chat or show that he’s now taller than me.
In an effort to connect, I’ve even tried really hard to learn his new “teenager” rules that include no photos, no affection in public and never, EVER commenting on his posts on Instagram. He gives me really good side-eye when I “act cool” around his friends or dance to hip hop in the car, but I have to admit I love to tick him off sometimes. I also quickly learned that sending him filtered photos of me on SnapChat was not going to score me any points either. I get it though, he has a reputation to protect and his buddies matter in some ways, more than his parents do at this point, but I wasn’t ready for all of this.
I guess having a teenage is not all bad, Puberty. In fact, there are so many wonderful moments that actually make me want to hold on even tighter and resist these changes even more! We continue to be so proud of how Ty carries himself in the world, acts respectfully to others, is a conscientious student, and a great friend. He helps around the house a lot (even without being asked) and has naturally taken on the morning routine to help me each day. Wherever we go, we still get the same compliments we’ve had his whole life and we can’t help but beam when strangers tell us we did a great job raising him to be so kind and polite. He truly is an amazing kid and we continue to be so very proud of him and the man he’s becoming, despite the hiccups of the teenage moods.
Recently I’ve been thrilled that we’ve shared a few cool Netflix obsessions together and one night, after several The Walking Dead episodes, my teen son leaned over and promised to protect me against zombies, if there was ever an Apocalypse. Maybe for now, I’m just going to have to take those moments when I can and hope that you return him back to me before he goes away to university.
Sincerely,
Mom Missing Her Little Boy
P.S. Be gentle when his brother hits 13, please. My heart won’t be able to take that one!
Jennifer
March 24, 2017 at 3:06 pm (8 years ago)and now I’m bawling. It’s coming for us soon.
Heather Hamilton
March 25, 2017 at 8:27 pm (8 years ago)Thankfully, Jennifer, there are some beautiful moments that I really appreciate now. Good luck!
Xavier Alexander
July 20, 2017 at 2:22 pm (7 years ago)You’re a great Momma. Gods are watching you and all your love for your family. Have a greater life ahead.