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| Mother’s Day 2010 |
The days leading up to today have been filled with memories of Zack, memories of our family as it was and my favourite memories with all of my boys.
Zack has been around me this week- since the creation of Zack’s Dream Room, I’ve felt him with me. There have been signs in abundance, as I remembered the beauty and joy in being Zack’s mom. Spending time with Ty and Jayden playing LEGO this week, I was abruptly stopped mid-creation, when our sweet puppy, Roxy squeaked her toy in the phrasing of “Elmo’s World“. Ty and I both looked at each other, and just so it wasn’t just me…I asked him…”what did you hear”….he said “Elmo’s World“. Again, as we enjoyed an amazing family day at Sunnybrook Park yesterday, another sign. Jayden had climbed a tree beside another little boy about his age and without having any interaction between them, the boy started singing “La, La, La, La, Elmo’s World“!!! I started to cry, knowing that these messages were from Zack, just when I needed them most.
It doesn’t take a special Sunday in May to make me feel honoured to be a mom. In fact, those “Mother’s Day Moments” happen every day.
It happens when Ty puts his arms around me spontaneously, not wanting to ask to play a video game, but because he really loves me.
It happens when both of my boys choose ME to have snuggle time and lay with them at night.
It happens when Zack learned to climb our stairs, not to get Elmo, but to get to me, his biggest cheerleader, at the top of the stairs.
It happens when Jayden holds my hand after a day at the zoo and says, “I had a great day with you today, Mommy“.
It happens when something private or emotional happens to Ty in his day, and he comes to me, knowing that I will love him through whatever is bothering him.
It happens when Jayden goes into the Disney story in Florida and, using his own money, buys the Tangled doll that he knows I will love.
It happens when we packed a 4 ft wrapped package of Barbie furniture and dolls to our Christmas in Chicago, because Ty had bought this special gift for me.
It happens when my eyes meet Jayden’s after his day at school and he can’t wait to run into my arms.
It happens when I held Zack’s hand for the first time and noticed it’s imperfections, and the last time when I remembered exactly how it felt to feel his skin, touch his hair and most importantly, how it felt to be his mommy.
It happens when Jayden calls me his “Best Girl” and promises to marry me and only me when he grows up.
It happens when Jayden asks me to stay and eat lunch with his friends after I volunteer in his class, just because he wants to introduce me to his friends and doesn’t want me to leave him yet.
It happens when Ty looks at me with complete adoration when I put the worm on the fishing hook and then take off the 14th fish that he’s caught!
For all of these moments, and for so many more that I treasure- thank you to my three boys for letting me be their mommy…the best gift of my life.
